God is always at work in us but all too often we are closed to see it or, if we do see it, we're closed to accept it. I am reading a book that is so challenging me I want to share a portion of it with you. It's Peter Scazzero's book, The Emotionally Healthy Church. He challenges our normal thinking on discipleship when he says that a Christian really can't be a mature believer apart from a healthy emotional maturity. Time doesn't permit me to recount all he says about emotional maturity but in the book he lays out six or seven principles that he believes comprise emotional maturity. One of those is the ability to look at the core of one's self and honestly evaluate what we see. Emotional maturity includes the willingness, and the ability, to look at the center of our being and recognize areas of weakness and areas of compromise that need to be addressed and fixed. It is the ability to look at ourselves, and without casting blame elsewhere, take responsibility and ownership to fix those areas.
Listen to this excerpt-- I love it! "The gospel says you are more sinful and flawed than you ever dared believe, yet you are more accepted and loved than you ever dared hope because Jesus lived and died in your place." "God has given us the Gospel to create a safe environment to look beneath the surface. I don't have to prove that I'm lovable or valuable. I don't have to be right all the time. I can be vulnerable and be myself even if others don't accept me. I can even take risks and fail. Why? Because God sees the 90 percent of the iceberg hidden below the surface, and he utterly, totally loves me in Christ. We have a saying at New Life Fellowship: "You can be yourself because there is nothing left to prove."
If only we could grab hold of this liberating truth! I can be honest with my areas of sin and weakness because I have nothing to prove, nothing to gain. I am loved in Jesus and nothing I do or don't do will make him love me more or less. Sure the Lord wants me to change, He wants me to be like Him. But it doesn't affect His love for me. Emotional health begins with an honest look inside and a willingness to own up to what we see. Am I insecure? Am I prideful? Does gossip make me feel good? Am I a gossip? Am I too weak? Too demanding? Too arrogant? Sometimes looking inward means being willing to open up and let others help me see who I am. Did you know it's really easy to deceive ourselves? It's easy to put up walls so that we can't see our true selves. It reminds me of an ostrich that hides it's head in the sand and thinks no one can see. Or the little child that hides it's eyes behind it's hands somehow believing no one else sees either. The sad part is that others often see perfectly what you and I refuse to even look at or address. So looking within begins with me, but I often need help.
I remember watching a video one time of a business man who brought in some friends and coworkers, he was actually the boss, and asked them to share with him things about himself that they wished he would change or address. At first they were reluctant to speak but as he pressed, they eventually opened up. I remember the gist of his comments; At first it was painful to listen to but nothing helped me grow more than honestly looking at myself through their eyes.
So Lord, this is my prayer: "Help me be secure enough in your love to be honest with myself. Help me not to hide behind a wall of self delusion or a wall of ignorance. Help me change where I need to change. Help me grow where I need to grow. My hope is that when people look at me, they will indeed see a man who is being daily transformed into the image of Jesus. May they see a 'little Christ', a Christian."
From my heart,
Jimmy
